my journey through the loss of my first son and the life of my second

Monday, April 5, 2010

what is your favorite...???

When I was growing up I loved traditions. I loved how they created memories. I loved that you knew what was coming amidst the chaos. There were some things my parents tried throughout the years that just didn't stick. There were others that seemed to just fall into place. And, even others that they set out to put in place and they worked. Somewhere along the way I started the tradition of....what is your favorite __________ memory?? I played this game at every holiday, birthday, and sometimes just random get togethers. Every time I start this game there seems to be a collective, "Oh, great here we go!" I do give them a little credit for hating my game...I have a mom and dad, two brothers, three sisters, one sister-in-law, two brother-in-laws, three nieces, two nephews, and a partridge in a pear tree. So, when we play this game it can last a REALLY long time! But, I LOVE to hear others memories! I have a crazy good memory and some times feel stupid for the things I remember that others don't.

So, today on the three month anniversary of my son's death, I want to play a little game and tell you some of my favorite things! (yes, this is actually a happy post. I'm trying!)

My favorite memory with Ken is...

On July 4th, 2005 my parents threw a huge 4th of July bash. I love this holiday...fireworks, cookouts, swimming, watermelon...what could be better. How can you not love a holiday that makes little girls do this:

and this:

(these are two of my wonderful nieces)

Ken and I had just started dating a few weeks before. I knew this was the man for me. It was getting pretty late on this 4th of July and Ken and I ended being upstairs at my parents. We were standing at the top of the staircase and my dad started to play the piano. My dad has played the piano my whole I stood at the top of this staircase with the man of my dreams...Ken took my hand and put his other hand around my waist...he pulled me close and we just danced. The music continued to play and my prince charming was sweeping me off my feet. I loved that in that moment he held me like no one else ever had. I loved that in that moment the rest of the world was just us. I loved in that moment he was my everything. It is one of my favorite memories with him. I wish I could get back to that moment...the simplicity, the joy, the love. I love that man!!

My favorite memory with my son...

I didn't get a lot of time with him. But, for the time I had I am grateful. Most of our time shared he was in the womb. I loved knowing that he was in there and that my job was to take care of him. One of my favorite memories of him was around 15 weeks. He had been craving apples (and yes I think the food cravings are from the child!) all week. I had not had time to stop and get apples so the craving just kept on going. Finally on a Friday afternoon I had a moment to breath and I stopped by the grocery store and bought this HUGE bag of apples (8 bucks worth of apples!) I rushed home, washed them, and climbed into bed to watch a movie and eat my apples!! I was through with the first one when it hit me...yes, that wave of nausea overtook me...I spent the next two hours throwing up that apple and everything else in me. It was pretty late in my pregnancy to have morning sickness...but, sick I was!! I kept throwing up and finally got to a point where I was, I climbed into the shower with all my clothes on and just let the warm water hit me. When Ken got home that is where he found his poor, pregnant wifey...soaked, with clothes on, crying in the shower. I love that memory because it is such a "wilhite" kindof thing. That stinker wanted apples so bad and then the minute I gave in to the craving we were sick for hours...silly boy.

My favorite birthday memory....

would have to be my 23 birthday that I spent in Paris! It was an amazing trip. We spent the day at the Louvre. In the evening we walked over to a little cafe for dinner. The water is more expensive than the wine so I just kept drinking wine. When we told the waiter it was my birthday she brought me brandy to go with the most amazing creme burlee I have ever had!! When it was finally time to go...I stumbled out of the cafe and there in front of me was the Eiffel tower. I had no idea they light it up at night and really had no idea that the light moved!! I told my dad I needed to go lay down because I was so drunk the Eiffel tower was swaying...we all had a good laugh...oh trisha!

My favorite color is pink.
My favorite place to shop it Target.
My favorite purses are Vera Bradley.
My favorite hobby is shopping.
My favorite hubby is Ken ;).
My favorite verse is Psalm 71:20.
My favorite thing is STRAWBERRY chapstick!
My favorite person is my mommy.
My favorite place is in the crook of my husbands arm.
My favorite thing to miss is Camp Joy.

I could go on and on. My point is ... I love life. I love stuff. I love my husband. And, I do smile. I do like to have a good time. I do want to live again. I am working on that. It has been a slow walk back...but, I'm coming wait on me...don't give up on me just yet!

What are some of your favorites??

Thank you Lord for continuting to hold me through this and not ever let go of me!!


Karen said...

I loved reading all your memories and getting to know you better.

I love that your favorite place is in the crook of your husband's arm...precious!

lis said...

lately our favorites are tacos and my sister in law made a coconut cake that was awesome!

so yea, i guess food lol

3 months is rough, im thinking of you today xoxo

Beth Beyer Moats said...

My fav memories with you!

- Having sleepovers at your big white house and staying up late just talking!

- One night before a church trip, we were so excited that we decided to get up and exercise (jumping jacks,situps) in the middle of the night to try and make ourselves more tired. I don't think it worked.

- Sunday evenings back at church in the Good Time Gang or Youth group.

Thinking of you today and all the GOOD memories we both have.

Naomi said...

glad to read a happy blog! :) :) my favorite thing of all is to have my family together. It doesn't matter what we are doing, just so that we are together. That to me is heaven on earth...oh, and did I mention, my favorite thing to read is your blogs. So beautiful..they make me laugh and cry at the same time. xoxo

Trisha said...

thanks for the memories...I love to read them!!!

Beth - I remember the time we called Josh Bowen and pretended we were someone else, and you families station wagons, and gosh the list could go on and on....we had lots of fun times together!!

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