my journey through the loss of my first son and the life of my second

Thursday, June 3, 2010

deep end

My husband HATES the TV shows I watch...I love to watch all the shows about hoarding, OCD, mental issues, (I used to watch baby shows) ((not anymore)). Tonight I have watched a marathon of VH1's OCD show. I noticed tonight that all of these people suffered a great loss in their lives. Some it was a loss of innocence through sexual abuse and others lost family members.

Bottom line: I will do everything in my power not to be one of them!

Let's face it when you lose something so precious in your life you feel like you have lost complete control. I can see how OCD would give you the feeling of control. I think that my grief counseling and support group really help me not become OCD.

Yes, I take 3 different kind of anti-depprsants and 2 anxiety pills...but, I am hoping not to be here forever.

I have set goals after my loss...my first was not to become bitter with my life. I think this will be my second...don't go off the deep end...

4 comments:

fuzzandfuzzlet said...

I too watch a lot of those programs. I love Discovery Health and TLC. ( it drives my DH nuts)

I sometimes think we all have some degree of OCD that could be triggered at any time.

michelle hendrix-swords said...

...sounds like a good goal to me...

tasivfer said...

I agree - I think we all have a degree of OCD that can be triggered at any time, so having the goal of not going off the deep end is a good goal to have. You're making me feel like I should keep some floaties close at hand just in case.

Curls O Fred said...

That fact that you're aware of the possibility is a good thing. It makes sense to find ways to control parts of our life after being unable to control something like the death of your child. Don't be ashamed of the pills you take...you're taking steps to be the best you possible in these circumstances. That doesn't mean it will always be like this. Thinking of you. ((hugs))

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