my journey through the loss of my first son and the life of my second

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

the end is near

One year ago today my mom drove Ken and I to the airport to board a plane back to Texas. Our flight was early in the morning so we were going to spend the night at the Hyatt at the airport. Our flight was Dec 30, 2009...or so I thought. When we got to the hotel to check in the front desk clerk said our reservation was for the night of the 30th not the 29th. Whoops. I got us to the airport a whole day early. Our flight was actually scheduled for Dec 31st. My mom was already home by the time we figured out the mistake. So, we opted to just spend an extra day relaxing at the hotel.

It was the last time the three of us were together with no idea of the pain that was ahead.

Trent was safe, happy, and healthy.

I had no idea it would be his last days alive.

Dec 30th is when I started to dilate...although I had no idea that is what was happening.

These next few days will be hard milestones to cross. The emotions of those days still so raw.

When I think about it all it feels like a lifetime ago and then other moments I feel like I am back there living it all over again.

I miss him.

<3 Trent <3


Andrea said...

The anticipation and days leading up to our babies' angelversaries is not easy - it was difficult for me with Julia this Christmas too. I hope that you are able to find some peaceful moments in the days to come. I'll be thinking of you and Trent. XOXO

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